Pictures of your kids on the Internet?
Say, have you posted pictures of your children on the web? Then shame on you! At least according to some people.
I'm a dad, with two daughters currently eight and fifteen years old. And I've posted a few, not many, pictures of them on the web over the years. Those pictures are publicly available, thus making my children targets for pedophiles and other child molesters. Even though said pictures are quite innocent, no nudity, no bikini or swimsuit or even underwear or diaper shots.
The fact that they are on the web, linked to me, and me not keeping my name much of a secret, apparently means that I am, quite directly, telling pedophiles that they are welcome to come and help themselves to my offspring. How come? By not keeping my own identity secret, it is relatively easy to track me down and find out where my children live (the fact that I live some 100km or 60 miles from their home is irrelevant, I'm told).
Of course, and I hope this goes without saying, I have no wish whatsoever that anyone should ever do anything nasty to my children.
But I wonder, how bad can it be, showing a couple of pictures of your hopeful ones, simply because you are proud to be a parent?
The key point seems to be that the pictures are publicly available. And that everyone is a pedophile, at least the men. Men are, as we all know, constantly looking for women and children to molest, or masturbate to their pictures. The men who look for children are sick ones, but they're there. The only men who are not pedophiles are the ones who tell you to look out for pedophiles, except for those who really are pedophiles but pretending not to be. Feeling cornered yet?
So I ask myself, are my children that much more publicly available though a handful of photos on the web, than they are ...
The difference being, mind you, that in all those other situations they are present in the same environment as someone watching them. They are, in other words, within grabbing distance for anyone with a mind to do so. I'd be much more worried about having pedophiles in the neighbourhood than on the web. For my own daughters' sake that is.
The way I see it, my kids are much more publicly available in real life than through pictures on the web. If I should protect my kids by the same thought model as with web pictures, I would have to lock them up and make sure that nobody, nobody, found out that they ever even existed.
It is at least as dangerous to have your children walk to school and home again on their own, or even together with other kids, because people could see them and snatch them.
It is at least as dangerous to let your children go to school at all, because some of the teachers might be pedophiles. Or some of the other kids' parents who bring or pick up their own might be, and run off with yours.
It is at least as dangerous to bring your children to the beach, little children bathing naked in the sea, or slightly older ones wearing shorts or a swimsuit, because there might be pedophiles at the beach too, just waiting for the moment when you're distracted and not looking.
It is at least as dangerous to let your children go to friends' places, not to mention sleep over, in case that friend's dad, or uncle, or older brother, or some of their friends again, are pedophiles.
It is at least as dangerous to let your children go to football practice, or ballet class, or band camp, or to the supermarket to get the milk and cheese you forgot when you were buying groceries, or to the mailbox to pick up the newspaper, or walking the family dog around the neighbourhood.
It is at least as dangerous to let your kids play in the garden, or at the local playground, because a neighbour or a passing stranger might be a pedophile.
Oh, and keep in mind that a stranger who knows your child's name is even more dangerous, because children are likely to trust people who seem to know them. So teach your kids never to tell their name to any grownups, or say their own name out loud in public, because someone might be listening. And never address your kids by name in public, for the same reason. Never shout your kids' names when you address them from a distance. Never put name tags, however discrete, on their school bag, lunch box, clothes, bicycle or other items. Never put your kids' names along with yours on the mail box or your front door sign.
And not only that, but strangers could also be watching you from a distance, with binoculars, watching the garden, looking at your kids, or at pictures of your kids on your own walls through the windows of your house. They could be taking photos of your kids, paparazzi style with a big fat telephoto lens, an put them on the web, perhaps even manipulate them into pornographic pictures.
In short, be paranoid. Always.
Ok, I'm exaggerating here, but only to point out how absurd some of those picture-on-the-web critics can be.
Now, I wouldn't put up naked photos of my kids on the web, any more than I would want them to walk around naked in public. Nor would I put up photos that were unfavourable, any more than I would like to have my kids pointed and laughed at.
So please, by all means, put pictures of your kids on the web if you want to. But as a parent I would advise a small amount of caution, or good taste as it were. Don't put the naked pictures there, if you have any. Don't put up pictures of your children that they would feel offended or embarrassed by. And don't put the kids' full name, home address, email address or mobile phone number with the pictures. A little common sense goes a long way.
Bjørnar A. Haveland.
Proud father and hobby photographer.
Written in response to a number of newspaper/blog articles that basically say that people like me are mindless jerks who don't care if our kids are abducted, raped and killed, and that paranoia is the only way to live.
I'm a dad, with two daughters currently eight and fifteen years old. And I've posted a few, not many, pictures of them on the web over the years. Those pictures are publicly available, thus making my children targets for pedophiles and other child molesters. Even though said pictures are quite innocent, no nudity, no bikini or swimsuit or even underwear or diaper shots.
The fact that they are on the web, linked to me, and me not keeping my name much of a secret, apparently means that I am, quite directly, telling pedophiles that they are welcome to come and help themselves to my offspring. How come? By not keeping my own identity secret, it is relatively easy to track me down and find out where my children live (the fact that I live some 100km or 60 miles from their home is irrelevant, I'm told).
Of course, and I hope this goes without saying, I have no wish whatsoever that anyone should ever do anything nasty to my children.
But I wonder, how bad can it be, showing a couple of pictures of your hopeful ones, simply because you are proud to be a parent?
The key point seems to be that the pictures are publicly available. And that everyone is a pedophile, at least the men. Men are, as we all know, constantly looking for women and children to molest, or masturbate to their pictures. The men who look for children are sick ones, but they're there. The only men who are not pedophiles are the ones who tell you to look out for pedophiles, except for those who really are pedophiles but pretending not to be. Feeling cornered yet?
So I ask myself, are my children that much more publicly available though a handful of photos on the web, than they are ...
- walking to school and home again,
- playing outside with friends,
- swimming, nude or in a swimsuit, at the beach,
- visiting or even sleeping over at a friend's place,
- out shopping with me or their mom,
The difference being, mind you, that in all those other situations they are present in the same environment as someone watching them. They are, in other words, within grabbing distance for anyone with a mind to do so. I'd be much more worried about having pedophiles in the neighbourhood than on the web. For my own daughters' sake that is.
The way I see it, my kids are much more publicly available in real life than through pictures on the web. If I should protect my kids by the same thought model as with web pictures, I would have to lock them up and make sure that nobody, nobody, found out that they ever even existed.
It is at least as dangerous to have your children walk to school and home again on their own, or even together with other kids, because people could see them and snatch them.
It is at least as dangerous to let your children go to school at all, because some of the teachers might be pedophiles. Or some of the other kids' parents who bring or pick up their own might be, and run off with yours.
It is at least as dangerous to bring your children to the beach, little children bathing naked in the sea, or slightly older ones wearing shorts or a swimsuit, because there might be pedophiles at the beach too, just waiting for the moment when you're distracted and not looking.
It is at least as dangerous to let your children go to friends' places, not to mention sleep over, in case that friend's dad, or uncle, or older brother, or some of their friends again, are pedophiles.
It is at least as dangerous to let your children go to football practice, or ballet class, or band camp, or to the supermarket to get the milk and cheese you forgot when you were buying groceries, or to the mailbox to pick up the newspaper, or walking the family dog around the neighbourhood.
It is at least as dangerous to let your kids play in the garden, or at the local playground, because a neighbour or a passing stranger might be a pedophile.
Oh, and keep in mind that a stranger who knows your child's name is even more dangerous, because children are likely to trust people who seem to know them. So teach your kids never to tell their name to any grownups, or say their own name out loud in public, because someone might be listening. And never address your kids by name in public, for the same reason. Never shout your kids' names when you address them from a distance. Never put name tags, however discrete, on their school bag, lunch box, clothes, bicycle or other items. Never put your kids' names along with yours on the mail box or your front door sign.
And not only that, but strangers could also be watching you from a distance, with binoculars, watching the garden, looking at your kids, or at pictures of your kids on your own walls through the windows of your house. They could be taking photos of your kids, paparazzi style with a big fat telephoto lens, an put them on the web, perhaps even manipulate them into pornographic pictures.
In short, be paranoid. Always.
Ok, I'm exaggerating here, but only to point out how absurd some of those picture-on-the-web critics can be.
Now, I wouldn't put up naked photos of my kids on the web, any more than I would want them to walk around naked in public. Nor would I put up photos that were unfavourable, any more than I would like to have my kids pointed and laughed at.
So please, by all means, put pictures of your kids on the web if you want to. But as a parent I would advise a small amount of caution, or good taste as it were. Don't put the naked pictures there, if you have any. Don't put up pictures of your children that they would feel offended or embarrassed by. And don't put the kids' full name, home address, email address or mobile phone number with the pictures. A little common sense goes a long way.
Bjørnar A. Haveland.
Proud father and hobby photographer.
Written in response to a number of newspaper/blog articles that basically say that people like me are mindless jerks who don't care if our kids are abducted, raped and killed, and that paranoia is the only way to live.
posted by inShadowz at 1:33 PM
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